Kim Possible Porn Story: Confessions of a Teenage Heroine – Chapter 10

Kim Possible Porn Story: Confessions of a Teenage Heroine – Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I
only own my villainesses and Shego’s parents.

“Sweetie,
are you all right?” Avarius asked again, this time from right
outside the door, “I heard a crash.”

“I’m
fine…Dad,” I forced the word out. I’d have to save my
hysterics for a more private moment, “Just fell off my bed,
that’s all. Clumsy me,” I laughed.

“You
don’t usually sleep in so late. Did you catch that bug that’s been
going around?” He asked worriedly.

“Nope,
just catching up on my beauty sleep,” I assured him, staring at
myself. This couldn’t be happening. How
could this be happening? I pinched myself, and then slapped myself.
Nope. By some twist of fate, I was now my best friend.

I
showered and dressed with my eyes closed. Even we weren’t that close
of friends. She was so small. I mean yeah, you could tell she was
petite compared to most girls, but to actually feel
the difference between her and me… I know I’m not exactly an ideal
weight, but I could feel her hipbone poking out, and her stomach
caved slightly inward. How did she manage to fly with such a frail
body?

The
most amazing thing was that I wasn’t hungry. At all. I was tempted to
skip breakfast for fear of seeing Avarius, but the image of my mother
stopped that temptation in its tracks. No matter what I did, no
matter what I said, Mom always caught me and practically forced
breakfast down my throat.

“Breakfast
is what gets your metabolism, and the rest of your body for that
matter, started. You just went eight or so hours without any food.
Whatever you’ve got going can wait ten minutes for you to have a
piece of toast or something,” Was her speech. She wasn’t a
strict mother, but she had a couple set-in-stone rules, and eating
breakfast was one of them.

Avarius
was at the dining room table, drinking a cup of coffee and reading
the paper. He was dressed simply in a red plaid shirt and jeans, not
a hint of his bird costume to be seen. I’ve gotten used to seeing
villains outside their costumes; Killigan has a lumberjack coat and
Monkey Fist has been known to wear sweats on occasion. Back then,
though, the only villains I had seen outside their costumes were the
villainesses. He looked up calmly as I came by and smiled.

“Morning,
morning glory,” he said. This surprised me; it wasn’t a
reference to a bird.

“Morning,
Dad,” I replied politely.

“Did
you sleep well?”

“Yes,”
I must’ve if I went to bed Shego and woke up the next morning War
Hawk.

I
winced as a sudden pain ripped through my lower torso. It didn’t
leave, though it did slightly get better. I got a bowl of Cheerios
and went back to the dining room. As you might’ve guessed, I’ve spent
a lot of time around the Nest, while Avarius was away.

He
was silent, watching me eat. I felt a little self-conscious; was I
doing something wrong? Was there some little thing I had never
noticed about War Hawk that was a tell-tale sign that I wasn’t her?
Was he still thinking about me sleeping in late? Was I eating too
much or too little? Did War Hawk not eat breakfast at home?

“Chloe,
I know why you slept in,” he stated. Oh snap. He used her real
name less than I
did. I wouldn’t put it past Avarius to guess correctly.

I
froze as he looked me directly in the eye.

“If
you didn’t want to have a father-daughter day, you could’ve just told
me,” he said softly. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that I
looked absolutely stunned.

“No,
no, it’s not that!” I quickly assured him, “I was just
really tired, honest!” He smirked, arching an eyebrow.

“Too
many late nights with Golden Arrow catching up with you, eh? Just as
long as you keep up with your school work… and stay away from that
Tigress girl,” he shook his head, “That girl has no limits
and a thousand dirty, cruel, harmful tricks up her furry sleeve. Mark
my words, War Hawk, people will end up dead around her.”

He
was preaching to the choir.

“I
try. You can’t always get away from her, though.”

“Especially
with the crowd you hang out with, your “peeps”,” he
agreed. I finished and rinsed the bowl and spoon off before setting
it in the dishwasher, “By the way, someone keeps calling. I
don’t recognize the number, and they hang up once they hear me
answer,” his face fell, “Is there a boy?” He growled.
I laughed.

“No,
Dad,” I assured him, jogging off. This was so awkward, and he
had no idea.

I
picked up the phone and dialed my number, taking the cordless back up
to War Hawk’s room.

“Hello?”
I recognized my voice on the other line. It’s weird how your voice
sounds different inside of your head than outside.

“Ohmygoshohmygosh,”
I started saying.

“Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshwhathappenedtous?!”
She screeched.

“I
have no idea!” I exclaimed.

“Well,
then, how do we switch back?”

“I
don’t know. Did you eat any fortune cookies?”

“Be
serious!” She sighed, “Listen, I’m cashing in my favor.
We’re not going to tell anyone outside of the villainesses about
this, okay? Not your brothers, not your mother, not my dad, not
anyone. I’m barely passing myself off as you as it is, and if Hego
knew…if Hego knew…”

“Okay,
I get it, no telling,” Yeah, how awkward would that be? Hey,
Avarius, you might have noticed I’ve been acting weird. Well, I’m
actually Shego who switched bodies with your daughter on accident.
Sorry, “I’m sure between all of us, we’ll figure something out.”

“Yeah,
definitely. We just need to hold out until then. Oh crap.”

“What?”

“I
promised Dad I’d spend the day with him. I’ve been blowing it off for
so long now…”

“Day
with Avarius, no problem.”

“Seriously?”
I snorted.

“Don’t
sound so confident,” I said sarcastically, “Besides, I’m
pretty sure I got the better end of the deal,” I added as I
heard feet pounding towards her.

“Shego,
you have to see the crap Wego 2 took! I don’t even know how it got
out! Seriously!” Mego yelled, laughing. War Hawk moaned.

“Yell
“That’s nasty, leave me alone”.”

“Thanks.
Talk to you if I survive this.”

“Ditto,”
I hung up, “Ah!” I shrieked as the pain came back, fierce
and angry. And I had to go.

To
leave out the gory details, War Hawk failed to mention she was due
for her time of the month. And that she was completely out of
supplies, even Pamprin. There were no females in the lair besides War
Hawk, except for the birds, but they aren’t mammals.

Great,
just terrific.

I
got a pair of shoes, her purse and found her car keys on top of her
dresser. She was the only villainess who obtained her car in a legal
fashion; saving her paycheck. Whether Avarius got the money for her
paycheck legally was a questionable manner. It was a mustard yellow
’85 El Camino. She’s upgraded since then, but keeps that butt ugly
car I refer to as the Pimp Mobile for sentimental purposes.

“Where
you off to, hummingbird?” There we go. I was waiting for the
bird talk. I turned to Avarius, who was sitting in the living room,
shoes and coat on.

“Oh,
well, I gotta go get something from the store real quick, and then we
can start father-daughter day,” To my horror, he stood up.

“I
can go with you,” he offered. I shook my head.

“Don’t
think you want to,” he looked pretty hurt by that. I scrambled
for something to say, “It’s a girl thing.”

Yes.
The phrase that makes grown men (or at least Drakken) stick fingers
in their ears and scream “lalalalalala”. The phrase that
made my dad run from the room and scream for Mom. The phrase that my
brothers said to each other to explain whenever I did something they
didn’t understand. Avarius, however, apparently did not know the code
phrase for, “Dad, I don’t want to talk about that with you or
have you with me”. He just rolled his eyes.

“I
know you’ve needed bras,” he stated a little louder than
necessary.

I
turned the darkest shade red imaginable. Arch enemies and talk of
female undergarments never went together comfortably.

“How
about we just go to the mall so I can grab my stuff while you…do
whatever you do,” I compromised.

So
we drove the Pimp Mobile to Crystal Springs Mall, which size rivals
the Mall of America. Avarius chatted like a caffinated five-year-old
and I tried to sound like War Hawk. I didn’t know how they interacted
outside of work, but Avarius didn’t question me. I must’ve been
saying something right.

I
slipped into Bullseye, a department store that was in competition
with Smarty Mart. Avarius looked suspicious when I passed by the
junior’s department and headed towards the cosmetics.

“I
don’t see why you wanted to leave me behind while you restocked your
makeup,” he said.

“Dad,
I didn’t come here for makeup,” I turned around and then said in
the softest audible voice, “I’m on my period and I need
supplies.”

Avarius
took it a lot more maturely than any male I’ve ever uttered the “p”
word to. He straightened and his eyes widened as if to say “oh”.
And then, without thinking, repeated it so everyone within a 3 aisle
radius could hear him.

“You’re
on your period?”

My
hands flew to his mouth.

“Avarius!”
And then, in a very soft tone, “Yes, and I need to buy some
supplies. Fast,” I took my hands off. He laughed.

“You
could’ve just told me. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” he
insisted.

“Yeah,
but it’s not exactly something I want to bring up,” I muttered.

We
separated then on our search for items no one wants to hear about. I
was glancing down a row of pink and purple boxes when I heard an
unpleasant purr behind me.

“Look
what the cat coughed up,” I rolled my eyes and turned to a
delighted Tigress.

“We
really need to stop meeting. At all,” I hissed. Her eyebrows
raised.

“Little
temper there, huh? Been hanging around Shego
too much?” Oops. I saw Tigress and my resolve disappeared. I am
submissive, I am caring, I am shy, I am in love with Hego, I am War
Hawk.

“Why
are you here?” I tried to add a little sugar to my tone. Tigress
shrugged.

“Just
looking around, seeing if there’s anything worth coming after hours
for. You?”

“Same
here.”

“Whatcha
looking for?” I shrugged, trying to copy her nonchalance.

“Nothing
in particular.”

Interrupting
the rare moment of peace with Tigress, from several aisles away,
Avarius screamed.

“ARE
YOU A TAMPON OR A PAD KIND OF GIRL, CHICKADEE?!”

I.
Wanted. To. Die. And I wasn’t even War Hawk.

Tigress
burst out laughing, gripping at her sides. My cheeks burned and I
covered them with my hands. I heard a thud as Tigress hit the ground,
kicking her legs and laughing out loud to a degree no one should
“lol” to. Avarius appeared innocently at the end of the
aisle.

“Did
you hear me, sweetheart?” He asked. My hands fell to my sides.

“Who
didn’t hear you?!” I snapped, hormonal tears prick my eyes.
There is nothing more dangerous, more completely absorbing than
estrogen, and I know guys don’t understand it. It’s like a hurricane
of mood swings, and the only thing you can do is to ride them out. So
this humiliation, in that moment, had been magnified to a hundred
times worse than it really was because of the estrogen. Combined with
an unfamiliar cycle and mood pattern, and I was helpless to War
Hawk’s hormones. A few stray tears escaped despite how stupid the
situation was.

A
relative of mine once introduced me to a phrase called “divine
imprecation”. “Divine” is like heavenly or coming from
above or insert belief about a power beyond our own here.
“Imprecation” is pretty much giving someone a curse.
Essentially, it’s karma coming to bite you in the butt. A lovely bit
of divine imprecation came upon Tigress just then, via the intercom
system in Bullseye.

“Hilary
Felina, this is your mother and boss speaking,” Tigress stopped
laughing as a familiar Russian accent spoke, “I don’t care what
your excuse for wandering off is. I have sent your sister out to look
for you and I am still in the junior’s department. You find your
sister and come back here. Bra shopping is not mandatory, though the
alternative is me picking them out for you. Trust me, you do not want
that.”

…I
thought my mom was cruel.

&

After
the Tigress incident, Avarius vanished. I bought some supplies, went
to the restroom, and (after buying them) hid them in War Hawk’s
purse. I wandered around the mall after that. Where had Avarius gone
off to?

I
was in Goth Central checking out the black nail polish when I felt
someone come up beside me.

“I
didn’t know you liked stuff like this,” I glanced to my right.
Mego was casually looking over the spiked bracelets that were next to
the nail polish display.

“Yeah,
well, Daddy Dearest doesn’t really allow this kind of thing,” I
dangled a nail polish container and then set it back down, “What
about Mrs. Go? I wouldn’t think she’d be too proud of her boy wearing
that,”
I pointed to the bracelets.

“Mom
had some paperwork to do and told Shego to take us to the mall. She
didn’t even notice that I snuck away, she’s so spaced out today,”
I smirked. He shoved his hands into his pockets, “Hego promised
he’d take me to Game Loco to try out Off Safety 2: Death Sentence-”
I straightened.

“With
the new Execution Style fire pattern?!” He arched an eyebrow.

“Yeah.
Wanna check it out?”

“Let’s
go!” I was halfway out the door, dragging Mego behind me, before
he even finished.

We
had a blast at Game Loco testing Off Safety 2: Death Sentence. We
compared the difference between it and the first Off Safety, and
agreed Off Safety 2 was way better. It was two player, and though we
could go against each other, we played co-op.

“You’re
not the girl I thought you were,” Mego commented as he reloaded,
shooting off-screen.

“Is
that good or bad?” I shot at a vampire soldier.

“Good,
really good,” he shot at another vampire that had almost bitten
me, “Actually, you kinda remind me of Shego.”

“Have
I been acting like her?” I asked worriedly.

“A
little,” he admitted as we ducked down in unison, “You
know, Shego’s pretty cool…for a girl anyway. I like hanging out
with her. You won’t tell her I said that, will you?” The alarm
in his voice caused me to laugh.

“Course
not,” we stood back up, “Aw!” My timing was off. I was
killed by a mutant general.

Mego
misaimed and was shot to death. We looked at each other and smiled.

“War
Hawk!” Metaphor exclaimed, running into the store. Golden Arrow,
Artica, and Mischief were right on her tail.

“What’s
up?” I asked.

“Something
is terribly, terribly wrong with Shego. Something must have happened
to her,” Artica said gravely. I furrowed my eyebrows.

“Why?
What’s wrong?”

“Brace
yourself,” Mischief warned like Martin Luther King Jr.

“Shego…does
NOT want to go…to…”Bricks of Fury”,” Golden Arrow
said slowly.

“WHAT?!”
Mego and I exclaimed.

“Yeah,
I know,” Metaphor shook her head, “We were just about to
steal Shego when Hego came running over with the news about “Bricks
of Fury” coming out a week early. Her response?”

“That
movie sounds so stupid,” Mischief said in the exact tone I would
have used after an especially lame trailer.

“No
way! Shego’s been waiting for this since seeing the teaser trailer a
year ago,” Mego stated.

“Who
wouldn’t want to go see a movie about a night security guard who
brandishes his own form of justice using a cinder block?”

That
was when I got stares.

“Chloe,
you’ve hated “Bricks of Fury” since you first heard the
plotline,” Golden Arrow reminded me.

Oh
snap.

“Hey,
Mego, Hego was looking for you. You guys are going to the matinee,”
Artica said, not taking her eyes off of me.

Mego
and I glanced at each other. He gave me a “sucks to be you”
look and then wandered out. The minute he left, Mischief, Metaphor,
Golden Arrow, and Artica closed in on me.

“What’s
going on with you and Shego?” Golden Arrow demanded, her voice
low. I shook my head.

“It’s
crazy,” I warned them.

“Not
as crazy as you and Shego totally switching positions about “Bricks
of Fury”,” Mischief chided like Mrs. Huxtable from “The
Bill Cosby Show”.

“Since
when do you play video games with Mego and Shego is uncomfortable
around Hego? She went into American Eagle!” Artica exclaimed. I
outwardly cringed. I wouldn’t be caught dead in such a mediocre
store.

“Since
we switched places,” I said matter-of-factly. The girls looked
at each other.

“Isn’t
that a therapy exercise?” Metaphor said hesitantly.

“No,
like we switched brains or bodies or something. She’s me and I’m
her.” They looked at each other again. Artica snorted.

“No
way,” she insisted. Golden Arrow shook her head.

“Can’t
do it. It’s impossible to switch bodies,” she stated.

“You
have any other explanation?” There was a pause. Mischief snapped
her fingers.

“You
two have been hypnotized,
she said like the host from “The Twilight Zone”.

We
all shook our heads and bluntly stated, “No!”. Mischief
stuck out her lip.

“‘Kay,
then. Prove
you’re really Shego,” Artica challenged.

Just
as she said that, War Hawk (I?) came jogging into Game Loco.

“Please,
please don’t make me go to “Bricks of Fury”,” she
begged, pressing the ticket into my hand.

“As
much as I’d love to, I really should go find your dad. There was an
incident in Bullseye…” Golden Arrow cracked up.

“You
were in there?!” I laughed.

“Even
better, she was there with me,” I turned to War Hawk/myself,
“You should go. You’re the one who doesn’t want my brothers to
find out.”

“Well,
I’m convinced,” Metaphor spoke up. We all looked at her and she
shrugged, “I can tell when something’s been planned, and that
right there,” she motioned at War Hawk and I, “Wasn’t
planned.”

“That
wasn’t acting, either. They were completely in character. That is, if
they were in each other’s bodies,” Mischief mused like George
Lucas.

“You
can’t switch bodies unless you surgically remove their brains and
somehow implanted them into each other’s bodies. And I don’t see any
stitches,” Golden Arrow stated.

“Shego,
they already know that I don’t want to see “Bricks of Fury”,
cover or not. I don’t think I can endure much more of your brothers.
Please?” She unleashed the puppy dog pout. I smiled.

“Fine.
I’ll suffer through the movie just so you can go do whatever,”
We embraced and I went to the theater.

The
boys turned and stared at me as I trotted up to them.

“Shego
didn’t want to waste the ticket, and I’m apparently the only one she
could track down,” I white-lied. Hego Turned back to the
concession stand line, rolling his eyes. The twins turned back to
their imaginary war game. Mego smiled at me and came to stand beside
me.

“I’m
glad you came, or I’d be stuck with these losers,” I giggled. He
was so cute when he was trying to act all masculine. We went into the
theater and, as usual, Mego and I sat in the front row while Hego and
the twins sat in the middle somewhere.

“Man,
you are so secretly like my sis,” Mego said approvingly.

“You
talk a lot about her,” I noticed. He shrugged.

“We
understand each other. She’s pretty cool when she isn’t being all
cranky and whatever,” he settled into his seat, “I totally
dig her personality in a girl. Not like I would date Shego, big ew!,
but a girl like her…” I took his hand.

“I
think you’re too young to be thinking about girls,” I
reprimanded him. He groaned.

“That’s
what Hego says.”

“Bricks
of Fury” was awesome, way more so than I imagined, however as
the series progressed through the years it got worse and worse. The
first one was one of my favorites and to share it with Mego… it was
one of the few bonding moments we’ve spent alone together. And, until
the end, it was a good memory.

Then,
the final scene went mushy. The guy’s girlfriend freaks out after she
find out he’s the guy killing all the crime lords. The ending would
have been way better if the girl walks in on him killing someone, he
looks up and sees her, they stare a minute, she states “I don’t
know you anymore”, and then she walks away. But no, they have to
discuss morals for twenty minutes. Watching Mego, though, he seemed
to be concentrating on something else instead of being bored to tears
like me.

He
yawned, which caused me to yawn of course. I was just about to
whisper to him how lame this was when his arm wrapped around my
shoulders. I turned to him.

“Are
you cold?” I asked. He gave a sly smile.

“Not
next to someone so hot.” I shrieked and scrambled away, “What?”
Mego asked innocently.

“Did
you just try to hit on me?!”

“Yeah,”
I screamed bloody murder, clutching my ears. Mego frowned, “Oh,
I see. You wouldn’t mind if Hego
hit on you.”

“Yes,
I would very much mind!” I stood up. Mego blocked my path.

“What
does Hego have that I don’t, huh?! Is it the super strength?! Well,
is it?!” I ran up the aisle, “Don’t waste your time with
him! PICK THE HOTTER BROTHER! DID OUR OFF SAFETY 2 CO-OP MEAN NOTHING
TO YOU?!”

I
nearly ran over War Hawk.

“Wow.
Is it really that bad?” I grabbed her by the shoulders.

“Mego
just hit on me! I’ve unintentionally created a horrible Bermuda Love
Triangle!” I ran screaming from the theater, hands still over my
ears.

That.
Was. So. Wrong. Next time I saw him, after the shock had worn off, I
was going to slap the romance right out of that boy. He was my little
brother, my sweet innocent brother whose only concern was video games
and being well-liked at school. He wasn’t suppose to like girls until
he was 37. What had gone wrong?!

I
calmed down by the time I got to the food court, and I dropped my
hands to my sides. Avarius was sitting alone, idly glancing at the
bright neon restaurant signs. I went to the borderline dirty table
and sat across from him.

“Hey,
Dad,” his glazed-over eyes turned to me.

“Oh,
I’m sorry. I wouldn’t want you to be seen with me,” he stood up.
I grabbed his wrist reflexively.

“Dad!”
He looked down at me.

“I
don’t want to embarrass you,” he said bitterly.

“You
aren’t embarrassing me,” I insisted. His eyes softened.

“It’s
almost 2. You want to grab a bite to eat?”

“Sure,”
I agreed.

I
easily ordered War Hawk’s usual; a small Ceasar salad with a mango
peach smoothie. Avarius ordered fish and chips with a berry smoothie.
We sat back down at the borderline dirty table.

“What
have you been up to?” He asked.

“Oh,
nothing much. A shop here and there. I did catch a movie with Golden
Arrow.”

“That’s
nice. I saw them around here and assumed you “hooked up”
with them,” he sighed, “I’m sorry about what happened in
Bullseye.”

“Hey,
it’s okay. Tigress got it back,” It was a little sympathizing,
seeing Avarius this way. So…normal. And sad.

“I’ve
been trying to work on my volume level, but I guess I’m not trying
hard enough,” I played with my crotons.

“I’m
sorry, too. I said I was going to spend the day with you, and I kind
of ran off.”

“That’s
all right,” he stirred his smoothie, “I just need to wrap
my noggin around the fact that you’re a teenager now, and that you’d
rather be with your friends,” he looked up at me, “I want
to be part of your life, Chloe. I just want to be kept in the loop.
To hang out with you like this every once in awhile,” he got a
startled look in his eye and then shook his head.

“What?”

“It’s
nothing, just the birds.”

There
is a lot of irony in the superhero or supervillain line of work. One
of the biggest is War Hawk’s absolute hatred of birds. She couldn’t
stand a single species. If given the chance, she would kill one or
two and blame it on natural causes. Avarius, on the other hand, was a
vegetarian and absolutely in love with birds. But not like a crazy
vegetarian who won’t wear wool or drink milk. He just didn’t eat meat
besides fish. And was obsessed with birds.

“Do
you want to head back with me or hang out here?” I was startled
from my vegetarian and bird analysis, Avarius standing up. I stood
up.

“I’ll
go with you,” I said. His eyes lit up, and it was worth going
against War Hawk’s personality.

I
learned a couple things about Avarius and more than I ever wanted to
know about the hundreds of birds he cared for as we worked together
caring for them that afternoon. Tucked away in the woods, a fair walk
from the lair, was a
roost/nest/coop/gathering-of-birds-in-a-building. It was a bird
sanctuary he and War Hawk’s mother had started after their honeymoon.
The majority of the birds were injured, crippled for life, or unable
to be released back into the wild. He was very loving with them,
treating them like they were his own children (creepy but mostly
sweet). He had named the permanent residents, including a young
one-winged falcon named Robin.

“She
seems to like you,” he noted as she affectionately groomed a
lock of hair from her perch. I petted her feathers.

“She
reminds me of Mom,” I said quietly, remembering War Hawk’s
mother. Avarius nodded.

“That’s
why I named her after your mother.” Oh. I thought it was irony,
because she was a falcon. He patted me on the back, “You become
more and more like her everyday; beautiful, kind, intelligent. I love
you so much,” I smiled.

“I
love you too, Dad.” He was such a sweet pea!

We
were silent for a while and then, in a low voice, he started to sing
a song even I had heard him coo to War Hawk.

“Chloe,
Chloe, I’ve been woeing, what a sad world this would be, if all the
Chloes were transported far across the deep blue sea.”

He
couldn’t carry a tune, but I never heard anyone sing so sweetly.

&

“I
left you to the wolves yesterday, didn’t I? Between your brothers and
my dad…”

“Actually,
your dad is pretty cool.”

“And
utterly embarrassing. He still treats me like a little girl.”

I
spread out on the living room couch as I talked to War Hawk on the
phone. Nothing had happened last night, so we were still in each
other’s bodies.

“Chloe,
I would kill for a dad like yours. He just wants to be part of your
life. You’re so lucky; my dad has never tried to hang out with me one
on one.”

“What
about your mom? I don’t exactly see you spending as much time as
she’d like with her.”

“All
she ever wants to do with me is turn me into her villainess prodigy.”

“I’m
just saying you’re sounding really hypocritical right now,” I
hung up on her out of anger, sighing in frustration. I lay there, not
feeling like getting up.

The
phone rang a few minutes later. I was hesitant to pick it up, but
decided to anyway.

“Hello?”

“Shego?
It’s Metaphor.”

“Oh,
hey Metaphor.”

“Any
reason why no one’s answering at the Go Tower?” She asked.

“War
Hawk and I had a little spat. She probably thought you were me
calling back.”

“Oh,
well that’s not good to be fighting like that while you’re switched.
This whole mind thing got me curious, so I’ve been looking it up all
over the place,” I perked up.

“Really?
What’d you find?”

“Well,
it all comes down to two kinds of switching brains; the sci-fi kind
and the fantasy kind. Okay, so do you guys remember the switch?”

“No,
we were both sleeping.”

“And
this was…?”

“The
night before we saw you at the mall.”

“Been
hooked up to any machines lately?”

“Not
that I know of. Are you going down some checklist?”

“A
self-made one, yes. Have you come across any ancient artifacts,
relics, etc.?” I pursed my lips.

“Come
to think of it, Mego and I were messing around with some old pyramid
thing he picked up from a mission in Cairo.”

“That
sounds promising. I’ll talk to War Hawk and then I’ll come pick you
up.”

“‘Kay,
bye,” I hung up and went to go get some shoes and a coat on.

Avarius
saw me when I came back down.

“Where
you off to, hummingbird?” He asked.

“Just
going to go hang out with Metaphor,” I said. Just at that
moment, the doorbell rang. Avarius went with me to the door.

And
there, standing innocently in front of us, was my body, complete with
my Team Go uniform. Avarius went rigid, a snarl on his face.

“Shego!”
He hissed. She smirked. After an agonizing pause, Avarius laughed and
shook his finger at her, “You sly fox. You got me that time,”
he admitted. Metaphor changed back to her normal scaly self,
laughing.

“Sorry,
I couldn’t resist. Can I borrow your daughter for a bit?”

“Sure.
What are you up to?”

“Oh,
just checking out an Egyptian artifact I stole, watch the latest dirt
on Team Go, maybe do some homework, the usual.”

“Have
her back by nine, all right? She’s been having some unusual sleeping
habits lately.”

“Yes,
sir. Come on, War Hawk.”

She
cracked up when we got into her car.

“Oh
man, Team Go is in an uproar!” She exclaimed.

“What
do you mean?”

“You
know that interview you did post-busted-butt?”

“That
was forever ago,” I stated. Did they run out of good human
interest pieces or something? “So, what’s the big deal? Did it
turn out crappy?”

“Worse.
They edited it. “Shego: Running With the Wrong Crowd?” is a
classic example of the press taking a perfectly innocent interview
and twist it into something far from what you meant to say.”

“Oh
man. The “hang out with villains” thing?”

“Yep,
the “hang out with villains thing”.”

“That
title is so wrong. I’m not running with the wrong crowd, I’m running
with the right crowd!” She laughed and we knuckle-bumped.

“Don’t
you know it!”

Later
on, after this whole brain switching mess, I watched it. They had
twisted it to make me sound like I was hanging with the bad crowd,
including some footage from the security camera the night we stole
the engine (I highly suspect Artica selling the tape to them. She’s
not above such a thing). The reporter said some dumb concerning stuff
about my future. Hego wasn’t so much concerned about my future at
that time than how it “slandered the Team Go image”. That
kind of media splicing is what drove me over the edge most times. I’m
human; I make mistakes, more than most and yes I’m on a pedestal as a
super heroine, but that doesn’t mean you have to zoom in on it. All
you can do is try.

We
rang the doorbell and there was some agitated barking. I furrowed my
eyebrows. What was up with Go-go? War Hawk opened the door. We looked
at each other and then embraced. As simple as that, our stupid spat
was forgotten.

Go-go
stood nearby, anger burning in her eyes.

“What’s
wrong, baby girl?” I asked, scratching her behind the ear.

“That
isn’t my mommy. I don’t know what happened, or where my real mommy
is, but that is a fraud right there,” she said bitterly, glaring
at War Hawk. War Hawk shrugged as if to say, What
can I do? The do knows things, all right?

“The
pyramid’s up in Mego’s room,” War Hawk stated. We followed her
up.

Mego
was on his computer playing some violent game when we came in. He
glared at War Hawk.

“You
could’ve knocked. Geez, don’t you know anything about privacy?”

“Knock,
knock,” War Hawk said sarcastically, knocking on his head. I
grinned, thinking that was something I’d do, “We’re just gonna
check on your pyramid Rubix cube real quick…”

“Shego,
don’t! That’s for my project!” He whined.

“I’m
not gonna break it!” She retorted. Mego looked warily at
Metaphor, and then smiled at me. I pointed at him.

“You
say something and I’ll beat you so hard your sister’s bull accident
will look like a scratch,” I warned. He spun back around to his
computer.

Metaphor
picked up the pyramid, holding it close to her eyes.

“Whoa.
Someone was very attentive to detail. Look at these markings,”
she held it close to War Hawk and I.

“Wow.
They’re like tiny hieroglyphics,” War Hawk said.

“Not
“like”. They are
tiny hieroglyphics. This little staff thing is repeated over and over
again. It’s the symbol for life,” My head jerked up.

“How
do you know this stuff?” Metaphor smirked.

“Research,
nothing you’d
know about,” she teased, “Besides, ancient Egypt is an area
of interest to me,” Mego snickered.

“You
look
like something the Nile coughed up.”

“Shut
up, Mego. Now these other symbols all link to the life symbols,”
she showed us as she turned the different levels, “They all must
represent a special group of people…or animals. To reverse this, we
have to get these all aligned back to where they were before you
messed with it.”

“How
do we know they’re aligned?” War Hawk asked. Metaphor shook her
head.

“Sleep
on it like you two did, hoping we get the right alignment.”

“Shego,
you know Mom doesn’t allow tinkering with dark arts.”

“This
isn’t dark arts, Mego, and Mom doesn’t have to know,” I snapped.

“I
think I have War Hawk,” Metaphor announced, “There’s
Nekbet’s symbol, the goddess with the wings. At least, if these
symbols are supposed to make sense. I might have you, too, Shego.”

“Is
that some kind of fortune teller?”

“Shut
up, Mego!” We all exclaimed. He threw his hands up in surrender.

Metaphor
set it down and crossed her fingers. War Hawk and I did the same.

“Anybody
else up for lunch?” War Hawk asked. We went out of Mego’s room,
“You’re ALWAYS hungry!” She said, shocked. I laughed.

“Maybe
to someone like you, whose never hungry!” I teased, nudging her
playfully.

&

“Mmm,”
I groaned, opening one eye. My alarm clock read 4:00 a.m., and the
radio was on some crappy metal station.

I
was going to kill whichever brother did that.

For
a moment, I thought I was myself again. I wasn’t looking over a bunk
bed. I stretched and yawned. Ew, what was that smell? Or that smell?
Or that smell? I glanced down. These weren’t my blankets. Crap. I had
never been in this room before, and I couldn’t imagine who slept on a
broken mattress in a bundle of blankets on the floor and woke up at 4
in the morning. I hit the snooze button several times before finally
getting up at 5. I stumbled to the light switch.

Oh.
My. Gosh. I rubbed my eyes, and then rubbed them again, but the room
didn’t change from its black, gray, and white colors. Who did I know
that was color blind?! I ran to the adjoining bathroom and flipped
the switch.

Golden
Arrow was staring back at me, Tigress in the mirror beside her.

“I
didn’t know Golden Arrow was color-blind,” I murmured. Then,
Golden Arrow stepped forward while I stayed in place. She rustled my
hair playfully.

“You’re
the color blind one, silly kitty.”

&

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review.

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